Comment and criticism

[gavilan]

After my partner died last year, I decided to sell my London flat and live in Spain. I felt this mill was 'a protected space for reflection' and I wanted to find time to write. What I have written so far are what I would call small essays, usually 2 or 3 A4 pages long ... on subjects ranging from 'confidence'; the stream at the bottom of this garden; my experience of sitting still here ... and am now working on 'a sense of rhythm. I am not aiming to find a publisher. I am just interested in exploring ideas and I find writing makes me think and 'go in deeper'.
What I need is someone who does not know me and is prepared to read, comment and criticise these small essays. If anyone has time and would be interested to do so ... please pm me.

[BENIDORM]

Hello Gavilan,
Your post I feel is tinged with sadness, however you seem to be at peace with your thoughts and coping well with the loss of your partner.
I can understand how writing short essays would be extremely thought provoking, and could help you reach your inner most mind.
And I think that by writing about your deepest thoughts you could actually reach and help other people cope with their own problems.
What a good idea to ask for strangers to peruse your writings, I'm sure that would be a most interesting and rewarding task for them.

Good Luck.

Regards,
Gordon.

[gavilan]

BENIDORM: thank you for your sympathetic response. And I don't want to reject your warm thoughts but it was an enormous relief to me when Bob died. He had been in very poor health and pain for some years ... and I found that enormously stressful. If anything I feel liberated now and full of energy! Added to which there is no-one to tell me 'we can't afford that' or 'why do you want to do that for?"!!! I can make my own decisions ... a free woman!
The writer who has had an enormous influence on what I think, see and write is John Berger. Not that I think I can ever rival his writings but his clarity, simplicity and seeing 'what is behind the scene' have made me stop and look in a way I have not done before. That is what I am interested in exploring.

[anis]

..have you ever thought of joining an amateur writing group, Gavilan, with like minded people who also wish to express their ideas and experiment? Perhaps you could share writing, critique each others ?
I could put you in touch via pm ?

[gavilan]

anis: thank you for the suggestion of a writer's group but the problem is I am very shy and a bit of an isolationist as a result! Think I might have to 'go it alone' for this venture.

[katy]

There are probably some on-line writing fora where you could be anonymous.

[gavilan]

When I posted this request, I had no idea if anyone had time or interest enough to read my 'essays' and comment on them. But someone did ... and I sent one. I and it were slaughtered by the response. But the comments were valid, provocative and very helpful. I sent a second one, different subject and different style. This time the comments were slightly less vitriolic and again very interesting/helpful. But I made the mistake of questioning some and to defend/explain some of the things I had written. I was then told I 'really didn't get it' and was thrown out of class, with any possibility of re-entry completely blocked. I was shocked. I have been thrown out of class before but I usually managed to last beyond the second sitting! Then I did not care, I was bored and frustrated anyway but this class really mattered to me and I have 'shot myself in the foot' and am powerless to do anything about it. My only consolation is that I have those comments on two essays to at least re-think and re-write those. And I am hoping that the principals explained to me will be valuable when I come to re-visit other things I have written. So, in the hope that the person concerned will read this, I want to say thank you for what you gave me.

PS I am not looking for sympathy from A.com members ... this is a message to whom it concerns.

[Chunky Monky]

That sounds like an unnecesarily unpleasant experience.

Who was it? - tell truth and shame the Devil!

[katy]

Wow! It wasn't me guys Shall we open a book to guess who it is/was

[gavilan]

No prizes or books to guess ... I meant what I said ie to say 'thank you' to the person concerned ... I would prefer to leave it at that ...

[knowal]

gavilan,
If you are not interested in publishing on paper, have you considered starting a blog, which could be anonymous, or under a pen name, (like gavilan).
These are easy to set up if you have a google account, or msn also have blogs available.
You might be surprised how many readers are out there.

[gavilan]

White Horse ... thank you for your suggestion of a blog ... I find when I write on paper (I constantly print out whatever I write as I find that the only way I can really see/hear what I am trying to say) I give far more time and attention to it than eg when I write an email. Emails are so often instant and without much consideration (I learnt that to my cost recently!) ... there is something about a screen in front of one which seduces one into fast and unthinking work ... and I fear the same with a blog.

[pwwm]

As you are good with pen and paper, you could write it, then just copy to a blog, that way as you say it wont run away with you, and I would like to add, please dont let whomever it was get you down. I, like Benidorm admire your spirit in sitting down and writing.

¿ How many of the rest of us do?

[gavilan]

pwwm: I was feeling very low this morning ... and your support/encouragement lifted my spirits ... it is such a strange thing this internet connection with anonymous people ... sometimes one can be bashed to pieces and at other times get such a helping hand when one needs it most (like your post today) ... thank you.
I am reminded of a book I read recently about how the internet is changing the way we read, think and write ... 'The Shallows' by Raymond Carr ... worth reading!

[Jool]

Saying you really don´t get it to anyone is rather like saying you don´t agree with me and I am 100% right.........I am sure there will be more helpful sources of feedback elsewhere but of course if you are asking to be challenged you need to find a way to handle those challenges without feeling crushed by them - not easy with such a personal medium as writing.

There is someone on the Arboleas forum who writes a blog from time to time - maybe he could help you out?

[gavilan]

Jool: I wasn't crushed by the criticism ... it was brutal but nevertheless very perceptive and interesting. What has crushed me is: to be thrown out so abruptly ... without warning and with all access denied ... so I have no idea what made the respondent so angry and despairing of me!

[BENIDORM]

Hello Gavilan,
I would say that after reading over the years your writings, they don't need investigation or appraisal .

Go with your own thoughts , you don't really want to become a clone of someone else, your style is good.

Loneliness is a dark place to be avoided, I think that you will find that strangers can often become your best friends.
There are plenty of good and caring people on this forum who would be happy to become your friends and give good thoughtful and constructive comments and I'm sure that they would also benefit from knowing you..

The blog idea is great...

Take care,
Regards,
Gordon..

[gavilan]

BENI: thank you for your gentle and thoughtful comments and encouragement ... and will think seriously about a blog ... if/when I do one I will let you know. Meanwhile I really appreciate your support.

[gus]

Gavilan,
I've sent you a pm I think?
Gus

[gavilan]

gus: yes I have just picked it up, thank you.