cost of freinds staying

[katy]

Family is not a problem, they even have a food delivery from Hipecor before they arrive. "Friends" is such a vague word, probably only have about 4 real ones. The rest I would call dinner companions

[kexon]

I am not saying your friends are the same type as ours,but we did have a similar situation a couple of years ago,where we paid for everything when we went out and in the home ended up being the pool cleaners,sunbed attendants taxi service head cook,waiter etc etc!The following year when they asked to visit,I said yes but told them they would have to cook and have a hire car as my husband has been ill and he is my priority and guess what I was stunned by the utter silence!!Whatever you decide to do,do it sooner rather than later and you will soon find out whether they are real friends or scroungers after a relatively cheap holiday of convenience.

[jukim]

We have friends come and stay with us (and vice-versa) and occasionally have holidays together. In either case we "have a kitty" and all expenses are shared from the outset. There is no embarrassment or awkwardness it is just a simple way of dealing with matters.

This sounds by far the most sensible...

[spanish_lad]

i guess in a way we´ve been relativity lucky.

when my gran and my aunt come to visit .. we go shopping, they pay. we go out, they put fuel in. i need 100€ for a passport or a car part and i dont have it, they lend.

unfortuntaly everyone else that has been here has sponged off us in one way or the other. i had an american friend come over she never contributed a centimo, complaining that her flight was very expensive and im lucky that she came to see me

ive got a friend who comes over once a month or so (not so much now), and he´ll help me with my car if i need a hand, then he drinks all my beer, eats all our food. occasionally he´ll eat on his own, very rarely... but most of the time, if we go out of a night, he´ll expect me to pay for the pizza and beers in the bars

there again, ive got another friend, who comes to see me once a month or so... she´ll pay for shopping, food, drink, petrol, her argument is.. we let her stay.

i guess it all boils down to peoples upbringing, their morals etc. if they dont act fair, i guess we´ve gotta put them in their place

[oliveview01]

A lady I know asked my friend for my email address............. she thought she would like to come out and see us...................WHY??????????????????????? Our kids played together now and again when they were about 4 years old.....................she wasn't given my email address

[spanish_lad]

classic.. thats gotta be a case of "oooh, you live in spain, it´d be nice to come visit.. lol"

cheeky gets

[deb]

yipee they have gone home now. We added up how much they cost us last night. 100,00 euros extra in fuel, 100,00 extra on shopping, 4 meals out that we would not of gone for 160,00 plus extra electric especially as they kept using my tumble dryer every day. They will not be coming back, from now on we will only have family to visit who do pay there way.

[oliveview01]

I came here (UK) for 5 days and have been here for 14 by the time I go home.......... hope I'm not like a bad fish
I have done my bit though, bought food and cooked and done some housework

[nuevanerja]

We do not live in Spain but have had a place there for over 25 years. I find that people I have not heard from for maybe 2 years email me giving me the hard up story then mention 'we do not know what to do about holidays this year we have not had a holiday for sometime'. I used to fall soft and say you can use our place but not anymore they never offered to pay for laundry electricity etc but you learn. Now we say since we refurbed we do not let to anyone that soon gets rid of them its happened twice recently and guess what I do not get a follow up reply. Thats so called friends

[Scot]

We had a call last night from a friend in Malta needing to stay for a few days with us. The same friend spent a few weeks in London with my OH and stayed in 24/7 with his son both running the central heating and using the food from the freezer when we were struggling to pay our way and he has 50k left in the bank - something wrong with our friendships I think

[sheilap]

it's hard for both parties what to expect from one another my brother-in-law has a very up and comming hotel in Guernsey and when we had a get together I went to the bar and paid for lunch as it is his living was my thought
It was not much just a lager and sandwich, weeeeeeell all hell let loose for him to come over and ask if I came to your house would you charge me for a lunch OOOppps
he returned my money
but if they are good friends they would help out
but it looks like you have what we call fair weather friends
GET RID

[Retro P]

My holiday home is in Nueva Andalucia but I also own a flat in Alfaz de Pi (Benidorm) close by anyway, my cousin hasn't spoken to me for over fifteen years (like I give a f***) because I refused to give it to him for free.
I work like a trojan and have done for thirty years, he just works when he needs a few quid to get by with and seems to think that because I have more than him I should gratefully share it

[Mowser]

When we go back to the UK, we wouldn't dream of asking friends to put us up. Why on earth do some "friends" think it's OK to expect to be put up for free when they come to Spain?

When we have people over we have what we call "The Peoples' Purse". We all contribute and that's what we use. If the purse runs a bit low, we top it up.

Having said that, some "friends" at the end of a holiday asked how much was left in the purse as they wanted to have their share back. I told them there was about €4 left so we would have a euro each. Yep ... they put out their hands for the euro.

(ps ... they won't be staying with us again).

[metalmonkey]

Hi we've had this situation as well but I think you have to be absolutely straight with them before they come..we say we're happy for you to visit us but we can't afford to pay for everything so what we have done with all our friends is that we go halves to pertol everytime we fill up and when you come we will go shopping for the week and go halves or I can shop and you pay half when you come. Sounds a bit harsh but if you are 'up front' it's better and everyone nows where they stand. Even easier if you email and get it all sorted before they arrive.

We have friends who also have a casa rural B&B and their frinds expected to come and stay for free so what they said was' if you come during our opening season you will have to pay as a guest but if you come in the closed season we will go halves to everythign'

It is much easier in the long run if everyone knows where they stand.....

[Nimrod]

I would agree with that.
We always work a kitty system.
If it's someone we haven't done it with before we say"We're putting 200 euro" (or whatever)in the kitty and it's obvious they have to do the same.
If we go out for a meal and we want to pay for all of us it's "This is on us"and it doesn't come out of the kitty.
You have to be upfront with people,it always worked for me when I was in business,no reason why it doesn't work in civvy street.

[Julie]

After time reading this thread, I am pleased to say I don't have any friends, Its great

[Mowser]

After time reading this thread, I am pleased to say I don't have any friends, Its great

Will you be my friend?

[Julie]

Of course I will, but only if you stick by what you said about not asking me to put you up when you come to the UK lol !

[katy]

It's not just about sharing. Our (previous) friends expected to eat out every evening. After a week we had spent about 600 euro more than a normal week, plus petrol, more water/electric etc. They would stay up later than us, drinking our booze and we would get up to dirty glasses all over. We stopped it some years ago, not just the cost it's the way they treat your home.

[anis]

You're right about the extra load, Katy. I have now had to warn some friends and family before they arrive that we are not on holiday like them, so please to remember we are still working fulltime and cannot take them out on trips every day,etc., so hiring a car would be most useful, since we only have one car ourselves and need it for work, or they can sit in all day and enjoy the sun and pool, until we are free. This really helps because I don't particularly want to visit Ronda, caves at Nerja etc., three times a year !
I sound really mean but we have had to resort to this because our livelihood comes first.
We have occasionally stayed with friends in the UK who also work and we have had a meal waiting for them when they come home, done the housework and ironing if needed or a bit of gardening.
They reciprocate when they come out to see us and we all use the kitty system, but they insist on treating us to a meal on them. They have been good friends for over 20 years so it must work.
They visit annually and we are delighted to see them and enjoy their company.