Delicate enquiry.

For tips, tricks and secrets on good health, beauty, fitness and sport join this forum.
lizzie
Andalucia.com Amigo
Posts: 163
Joined: Sat Oct 13, 2007 1:04 pm

Delicate enquiry.

Postby lizzie » Sun Aug 24, 2008 10:55 am

A good friend has recently been devastated by finding out that her husband of 20 plus years has had several affairs. They have parted as he says he needs time to "find himself". During this period their married life was completely normal and she is now terrified that she may have an STD. She is too embarrassed to visit the local medical centre as she knows all the staff and feels very humiliated.

Are there any private clinics that offer a testing service, or maybe even kits from a chemist? She lives in Granada province, not too far from Motril.

Can anyone help please? It is dreadful to see her so worried.

mel2727
Tourist
Posts: 16
Joined: Sun Sep 16, 2007 3:44 pm
Location: coin

Postby mel2727 » Sun Aug 24, 2008 2:21 pm

Hi, a private doctor will offer this service, i recently had a full check up of this sort went privatly with local english doctor, he charged me 70e and i had all results back I think within 10 days.
I would recommend him but his surgerys are in the marbella area so prob a little far for you, PM me if u wish more info x

User avatar
karandjon
Andalucia Guru
Posts: 2195
Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2007 10:03 am
Location: Matalascañas

Re: Delicate enquiry.

Postby karandjon » Sun Aug 24, 2008 6:10 pm

lizzie wrote: She lives in Granada province, not too far from Motril.
lizzie - there is a new (2 or 3 years old) centre opened up in Motril that undertake all sorts of tests/screenings/scans. You will see it as you go past Alcampo. You can´t miss it. I understand it is a walk-in centre and that you can pay privately for treatments. I havent used it, but it had just gone up, just as we were moving away from that area.
Hope this helps,

Karen
vino, sol y aire, y seras rico como nadie

lizzie
Andalucia.com Amigo
Posts: 163
Joined: Sat Oct 13, 2007 1:04 pm

Postby lizzie » Sun Aug 24, 2008 7:09 pm

Many thanks. At least that gives her some options.

User avatar
gretch
Resident
Posts: 433
Joined: Sat May 28, 2005 8:14 pm
Location: Northern Almeria

Postby gretch » Mon Aug 25, 2008 10:19 am

Why should she be embarrassed, tell her she should to go to her local medical centre and tell all the staff why she’s there, and what a rotten, cheating, scumbag her husband is, in fact, tell everyone she can, she’ll get the ‘sympathy vote’ and his name will be mud.

As for the husband ‘finding himself’, tell your friend to change all the door locks, just in case he finds himself back at her house.

gretch

detourer
Resident
Posts: 619
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2005 12:00 am
Location: Alhaurin el Grande

Postby detourer » Mon Aug 25, 2008 1:21 pm

And that will make her feel a whole lot better...........not!

..
Go to the grave in an attractive and well preserved body? Rather skid in sideways, women on each arm, champagne and credit card in each hand, body thoroughly used, abused, totally worn out and screaming …."WOO HOO, WHAT A RIDE"

User avatar
annie_d
Resident
Posts: 851
Joined: Sun Aug 20, 2006 6:03 pm
Location: Stockport and Salinas

Postby annie_d » Mon Aug 25, 2008 6:14 pm

But of course that will make her feel better.
anyway, anyway, love from me.

yummymummy
Andalucia.com Amigo
Posts: 109
Joined: Fri Jun 24, 2005 12:16 pm

Postby yummymummy » Mon Aug 25, 2008 8:40 pm

I agree with Gretch, your friend has nothing to be embarrassed about as she has done nothing wrong. I too would explain why I would want all tests carried out - if anything she will gain a lot of respect (unless of course she takes the offending idiot back) ....

If she has private health and feels more comfortable visiting a doctor outside of the area then there will be plenty of private doctors who could assist. However, if she doesn´t have private health insurance I´m guessing it will be a hefty bill with the tests they will need to carry out and if I were her I would send the bill to the offending idiot that is her husband.

I hope it all works out ok for her and she finds inner strength to get through this.

User avatar
louise225
Andalucia.com Amigo
Posts: 94
Joined: Fri Mar 14, 2008 7:19 pm
Location: Derby, England

Postby louise225 » Wed Sep 03, 2008 7:16 pm

My partner of several years had an affair (and maybe affairs), and like your friend, I was terrified that he may not have been careful and I could have caught something. I eventually got up the courage to go and be tested, and the staff were fantastic and I was fine.

I'm sure she will find that she is fine too - after all, her husband is obviously extremely selfish to have done this. He was in it for what he could get out of it, gave no thought to anybody but himself, so he wouldn't put himself at risk either of an STD or getting someone pregnant!

Bongtrees
Andalucia Guru
Posts: 2341
Joined: Wed Dec 15, 2004 4:51 pm
Location: Valencia

Postby Bongtrees » Wed Sep 03, 2008 8:28 pm

louise225 wrote:

after all, her husband is obviously extremely selfish to have done this. He was in it for what he could get out of it, gave no thought to anybody but himself, so he wouldn't put himself at risk either of an STD or getting someone pregnant!
Contradiction in terms, surely :shock:

joan
Tourist
Posts: 20
Joined: Tue Sep 07, 2004 4:24 pm

Postby joan » Wed Sep 03, 2008 9:20 pm

Nope....brings back the old phrase 'wham, bham..thank you mam'....then goes on his way leaving no traces and no little beings who will trace him in years to come!

I agree with all of the above...what a scumbag!

User avatar
louise225
Andalucia.com Amigo
Posts: 94
Joined: Fri Mar 14, 2008 7:19 pm
Location: Derby, England

Postby louise225 » Thu Sep 04, 2008 5:55 pm

Bongtrees, see what you mean - bad phrasing!! I suppose I meant he would look after himself, so inadvertently, he would have looked after his wife. Louise

Bongtrees
Andalucia Guru
Posts: 2341
Joined: Wed Dec 15, 2004 4:51 pm
Location: Valencia

Postby Bongtrees » Thu Sep 04, 2008 6:48 pm

louise225 wrote:Bongtrees, see what you mean - bad phrasing!! I suppose I meant he would look after himself, so inadvertently, he would have looked after his wife. Louise


Do you know him intimately then?

User avatar
louise225
Andalucia.com Amigo
Posts: 94
Joined: Fri Mar 14, 2008 7:19 pm
Location: Derby, England

Postby louise225 » Sat Sep 06, 2008 1:15 pm

Definately not!

alaninspain
Resident
Posts: 920
Joined: Fri Sep 30, 2005 8:28 am
Location: Benalmadena

Postby alaninspain » Sat Sep 06, 2008 2:47 pm

With a bit of luck he will "find himself", penniless and homeless, begging on the streets. Let me know if you spot him, and I will give him a couple of hefty kicks as I pass him. The I will offer to log on to one of the Ancestry websites to see if I can find his parents and introduce him to them.
My brain works like lightning -one flash and it's gone

User avatar
mijasmagic
Andalucia.com Amigo
Posts: 168
Joined: Fri Sep 28, 2007 10:21 am
Location: Mijas, Spain

Postby mijasmagic » Sat Sep 06, 2008 4:52 pm

How can you all condemn this guy without knowing the first thing about him, his wife or their relationship?
On the face of it, yes he´s done wrong, but we don´t know the state of their relationship!

Whatever the truth of the matter, I feel for the lady as she is clearly in distress, but please let´s not confuse that with any hatred for a guy who, again at face value, is struggling with the whole thing too.

lizzie
Andalucia.com Amigo
Posts: 163
Joined: Sat Oct 13, 2007 1:04 pm

Postby lizzie » Sat Sep 06, 2008 5:48 pm

Thanks for all the positive feedback, which has helped a lot. Despite all of this (and lots of nagging from me) she has not been able to cope with a personal consultation. However, good old Google found details of several suppliers of test kits for various "nasties", so although it may take a little longer to get results, at least her mind will be at rest.

alaninspain
Resident
Posts: 920
Joined: Fri Sep 30, 2005 8:28 am
Location: Benalmadena

Postby alaninspain » Wed Sep 10, 2008 4:58 pm

If you find you have become unhappy with your wife/husband/partner the sensible thing for all parties to do is to separate or divorce, not to continually cheat ( not just one mistake) on the person you married. I have no sympathy for him whatsover.
My brain works like lightning -one flash and it's gone


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Google [Bot] and 15 guests